I cannot tell you how much I hated my body, both when I suffered from emotional eating AND anorexia. Every time I overate, I felt guilty and hated my body even more. Hell, years of imprisonment where all my mental energy was focused on controlling my food intake and never feeling good enough. All I wanted desperately was to love my body and feel free but I had no hope this could happen to me one day.
Hating your body has nothing to do with food and weight.
I didn’t have a problem with food. Body hate has nothing to do with food and weight. The proof is that when I was overweight, I disliked my body and when I was underweight, I felt exactly the same. It seemed much easier to hate my body and drastically control my food intake than working on self-acceptance and learn to love it. Doesn’t it sound weird? I didn’t have the tools yet to change.
Loving your body doesn’t happen overnight especially if you have been hating it for so long, but it is possible to rebuild that loving relationship between you and your body. Not only is it possible but it is totally worth it because it is only when you start from a place of love that you will take good care of your body, let go of the control, the debilitating spiral of hate/binge/guilt/restriction and start a new chapter of your life.
6 ways I learned to love my body
1. I stopped comparing
As mentioned in previous posts, if you compare, you despair. Comparisons are NEVER EVER helpful in any areas of your life, should it be personal or professional. You are unique. I know it is easier said than done and it is so natural for women to compare to other women but think about how destroying it is and instead of being constructive, it brings you down and makes you feel even worse.
2. I saw beauty in imperfection
Again and again, starting from a place of hate will never bring you anywhere. Where did all the body hate get me? Nowhere until I practiced self-acceptance. How good it felt, how liberating! I had a choice, I could have either spend the rest of my life hating my shapes or I could decide to accept my body’s imperfections. Don’t get me wrong, it doesn’t mean you are “giving up”, it means you stop punishment and body hate. You start making the choice to see beauty in your body’s imperfections. This kindness makes it easier to take good care of your body with healthy habits.
3. I focused on health, not weight
Sorry if I repeat myself, it is only when you stop controlling food that foods stop controlling you. Focus your attention on health, not weight loss. Health is a positive goal, weight loss is a negative goal. Health focuses on adding the good foods, weight loss focuses on restriction. We all know that the body hates food rules.
4. I reviewed my inner circle
I couldn’t stand spending time with people who were judging others on the weight, shapes and appearances. Even worse, people who kept on complaining about their perfect bodies. Unfortunately, I heard this too much in my close circle and it was destructive. The people you spend time with have such a big influence on you and it was time for me to cut the cords with some of my biggest influencers and take control.
5. I changed how I speak to myself
When the negative thought pops, give yourself a reminder. Stop giving the negative thoughts such a big power.
Here is how it works. With a little practice, it becomes kind of a game.
You tell yourself: I hate my body
SWAP: My body is fine, I thank my body for everything it made me do until now.
You tell yourself: I am not good enough
SWAP: I am good enough, I am proud of my accomplishments
It is almost like 2 contradictory voices talking to you, the body hate one and the heart one. Let the heart voice speak louder.
6. I acknowledged that I was seeing myself incorrectly
Body hate changed my perception and I knew I was not seeing myself correctly. Even when I was at my lowest weight, seeing myself in a photo and catching a glimpse in the mirror were provoking a wrong image of myself. The way you view yourself is totally truncated and distorted when you hate your body.
I hope this blog will help you love your body more, start small with realistic and achievable goals. Remember to always start from a place to love, you cannot change a body you hate into a body you will love.
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